Snake vs Sonic
by Super Saiyan Buu
Summary: My Snake vs Sonic story!
1. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"Who are you?" asked Sonic.

"The name is Snake, Solid Snake!" Snake replied. He looked over at Tails with a questionable look on his face. "What the hell is that?" Snake asked.

"Don't ask me, I've had to be with him since the 90's!" Sonic explained.

"Sonic, why are you being-" Tails was saying. Snake aimed his gun at Tails and was about to shoot.

"Hey!" Sonic screamed.

"What?" Snake questioned.

"If anybody hurts him, it's gonna be me," Sonic said. He reached up and pulled the gun from Tails' direction. "Now, I hear you have information for us?" Sonic inquired.

"Maybe, maybe not, who's asking, not me!" Snake joked.

"Yes, you do, about my enemy, Robotnick!" Sonic said.

"Did you say, Robotnick?" Snake asked.

:"Yeah, why?" Sonic asked back.

"Well, you see, I was on my way here to find you dudes, well, when I say this fat guy I mistook for Fatman driving some stupid robotic machine..." Snake was explaining. "I yelled 'Fatman, Raiden killed you, you're supposed to be dead!'" Snake continued. "Who I thought was Fatman said, 'I am not Fatman, thank you very much, I am Robotnick, get out of my way, human!'" Snake explained. "So, I took my RPG and well, shot it at him, and, well he died!" Snake said. Sonic was visibly shaking.

"So...he...is...dead??!!" Sonic asked, through clenched teeth.

"As you're going to be in the next chap- I mean yes, he's dead!" Snake replied.

"THAT WAS MY DAMN JOB! YOU STOLE IT FROM ME! THIS WHOLE DAMN TIME I CAN'T DESTROY ROBOTNICK WITH ALL THESE FORMS OF SUPERSONIC, BUT YOU DESTROY HIM WITH ONE, FREAKING RPG SHOT?!!" Sonic screamed. "You, me, right now!" Sonic yelled.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

NOTE- I'm adding chapter 1 after 2 because I accidentally overwrote chapter 1 with 2. For those of you who read 1, this might be changed a little because I wrote chapter 1 on a different computer

"Sonic, where are we?" Tails questioned.

"Where do you think?" Sonic replied in a sarcastic tone. The two were venturing in Alaska, looking for someone who had information they needed.

"Ice Cap Zone?" Tails asked, in a smart-ass tone.

"Tails, does it look like Ice Cap Zone? Are there stupid little robots that I have to destroy just to free little rabbits and birds?" Sonic explained.

"First of all, no. Second of all, why are you being a meanie? I'm just asking questions!" Tails explained.

"I'm only mean because all you do is talk, and all the talk is stupid questions," Sonic said.

"No wonder I'm your only friend, if you can call me that!" Tails muttered. With that, Sonic picked off an icicle off a nearby tree, grabbed Tails by the throat, and jammed the icicle in his neck. Blood began to squirt out Tails's neck like a broken faucet.

"That oughta do it!" Sonic laughed, as he let Tails's lifeless body drop to the ground. About ten seconds later, his body disappeared. Ten more seconds passed and Tails flew back down to Sonic. All Sonic could do was stare in amazement.

"What you so surprised about? Just like in the game I don't get paid enough for, if I die, I come back to life!" Tails told Sonic. Sonic was still staring in amazement.

"Hey, you looking for me?" someone said.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

"Wait, little blue man, calm yourself!" Snake said.

"No! Killing Robotnick was supposed to be my doing! I was supposed to snuff him out! ME! ME!!! ME!!!!!" Sonic yelled at the top of his lungs. Snake and Tails looked at each other with a mix of shock and disgust.

"Does he always do this?" Snake whispered to Tails.

"Only on Thursdays," Tails said. Snake began to pull out his M9. He loaded some bullets into it. He aimed it at Sonic's head. All this time, Sonic was not aware of his fate.

"MY JOB! MY JOB! MY JOB! MY JOBUUUUHHH!" Sonic screamed, as he got shot with a tranquilizer dart.

"That was easy," Snake said with glee.

"My jobuhhh, miiihh jubbbhh, robuthnick, damn you thnake!!!" Sonic was mumbling as he passed out.

"Sonic? Are you okay?" Tails asked with worry.

"Hey, you're a fox, are you not?" Snake asked.

"Maybe, maybe not," Tails replied.

"Wanna become a member of Foxhound?" Snake asked.

"What's that?" Tails asked.

"Only the most elite group in America! Very powerful and very awesome! And, as an added bonus, we now meet Tuesday nights and have punch and pie!" Snake explained happily.

"PUNCH AND PIE!!!???" Tails yelled with joy. "I love punch and pie, punch and pie is the best!" Tails went on.

"I guess that means you want in?" Snake said.

"Hells yes I do!" Tails shouted.

"Okay! First, though, you must know the 'secret handshake'" Snake said with a smile.

"Secret handshake?" Tails said confused.

"Yup, ready? 1...2...3...GO!" Snake yelled and put out his hand. Tails just sat there for the longest time not knowing what to do. After a few minutes, Snake began to worry. "You don't know the secret handshake, do you?" Snake cried.

"I'm sorry, I don't!" Tails said, in an apologetic tone.

"I guess you can't be a member, and you can't have punch and pie!" Snake laughed. Tears started rolling down from Tails's eyes. "hahaha, are you going to cry now?" Snake teased. All of a sudden, there was a buzzing sound. Snake looked behind him and saw Sonic spinning towards him. Very fast. "Oh, shi-" Snake yelled. Sonic spun into both of Snake's legs, cutting them off. His body fell to the ground, and blood was draining where his legs used to be.

"Tried to knock me out, what were you gonna do, leave me in the cold?" Sonic laughed. He picked up Snake's RPG. "Are you ready for this?" Sonic asked. Sonic stepped back a few feet so he would not be caught in the blast.

"No, don't, please..." Snake begged.

"Fission mailed, bitch!" Sonic laughed, and shot the RPG at Snake. The blast was incredibly loud. Sonic looked towards where he shot the RPG and could not see anything but a hole in the ground and blood around it. "I am the master! The master! The mas-" Sonic was bragging. Tails shot him with the M9 Snake left behind. Sonic fell to the floor. Tails walked over to Sonic's sleeping body.

"I'm the master, blue bitch! Time for payback!" Tails shouted. He picked up the RPG, walked a few feet away, loaded another rocket into it, and shot towards Sonic. He let the RPG drop to the ground.

He proceeded to fly up into the sky. Where was he headed? That's for you to figure out.

THE END


End file.
